Weight-Loss Journey | My Story

Hey Guys!

I am so scared about posting this because it’s a very raw, honest, personal post, but I want to post it because I want to share my journey with you guys.
This post is going to be my story about how I gained a lot of weight over the years. I am in no way blaming anyone in this post, I am simply telling you guys what contributed to my weight gain so you guys get a little more vision as to how I gained it. I believe this post may be quite long so if you do want to read it, grab yourself a snack and some tea/coffee and enjoy.

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Primary School Days:

When I was younger I was at the perfect weight. I was actually a really sporty kind of girl, always participating in school sport events and was just really active. I use to come in the top 4 in cross-country which means I went onto the national school cross-country where I competed with other schools and I was really good at sprinting and hurdles. Sports were my favorite thing about primary school, which if you have met me now, you wouldn’t believe it if I told you.

In grade 5, I was pushed off the play equipment and snapped my femur in half. The femur as you all may know, is the strongest bone in your body. I snapped mine in half.. If you have read my earlier posts from when I started my blog, you may know I have a bone disease called Osteoporosis Imperfecta, which for short is brittle bones. It’s quite easy for me to break my bones which means I have to be careful with what exercise I do. I now have 3 rods/pins in my left leg which actually prevent me from participating in many exercises. I can no longer run as when I do, it feels like my left leg is going to snap again, which I know is just a fear from when I did break my leg. My leg will also ache for weeks after I run, which results in me not being able to walk properly. So I steer clear of that. I can’t lift many weights either, I’m actually not meant to lift over 5 kg according to my doctor, but I do anyway. I’ve injured myself many times in the gym from weight lifting and I’ve also gone into shock twice from being pushed too hard by a personal trainer. (yes I told them about my condition). All of this has put a lot of stress on me going to the gym, which results in me not going at all, which then makes me feel guilty, which then I overeat to dull that guilt. Although it just makes it worse.

I grew up with a family that loves to eat. When I lived with my mum, she would buy 3 massive cartons of different soft drinks/soda and when me and my siblings didn’t drink them, she would use the whole ‘I didn’t spend my money on you just for you to not appreciate it. If you don’t drink them, you can forget about me buying you anything else’, which basically made us drink them in the end. I use to drink 5-6 cans of soft drink a day up until I was 18. Yep. Gross. My mum wasn’t the biggest help either, she has a bottle of Pepsi max with her breakfast every morning, still.
She use to always pile our plates with a lot of potato, meat and hardly any vegetables. (I love potato, just not every night). The cupboards were full of chips, lollies, chocolate bars and maybe 1 or 2 pieces of fruit. Our lunch boxes for school was full of those little chocolate snacks everyday and we also got a soft drink as well. So as you can see, I didn’t grow up with the best foods. But because I was so into sports, I somehow kept my weight healthy at primary school, until I broke my leg.

High School Days:

We all know how high school can be, especially the first year. Because I couldn’t participate in many sports anymore, I started noticing my weight changing. I was putting weight on, not much but enough to make me really self-conscious. My mum still packed our lunches so we got a lunchbox full of chocolate, and because I was now in high school, I felt so embarrassed by it that I use to hand them off to my friends and had nothing the whole day. This went on for most of my high school years. My mum was the type of person that went by the term ‘you get what you get given or you can go without’, so I went without.
Dinners were always the same, plate loaded with potato and meat with little to no vegetables. I did gain a little bit of weight, but it wasn’t that much. The massive weight gain happened when I moved out of home and in with my ex.

After High School:

I moved to the city with my ex which was when my weight gaining started. We lived around the corner from a lot of take out stores and I worked at KFC, which means that’s all I lived off. I basically gave up on myself and didn’t look after myself at all and the weight started coming. When my ex and I broke up, I moved back in with my mum and basically drank every weekend and binged on take out. I didn’t care what I looked like, I didn’t care about my health and that led to me putting on a massive amount of weight. Over the years, the weight kept coming, I started smoking which led to me being out of energy most days, but still, I kept eating shit.

Now:

Now, 5 years later, I am at my biggest, I am unhappy, I have no energy and I am done feeling like this and always having to layer my clothes or cover up because I can’t stand the sight of myself. I have tried to go to the gym, I’ve been going since I moved in with my now boyfriend but because gyms put so much pressure on me, I never want to go.
I want to be able to fit into my dream clothes, I want to have a wardrobe with every single piece of clothing I love. I want to be able to look at myself and smile and be happy. I don’t want to feel ashamed in front of my partner anymore. So today, today I am changing that, and with me telling you guys my story and sharing my journey with you, that’s just the first step. I am ready to change myself for the better.

My Current Weight and Goals:

My current weight is 78 kg.

I want to get down to 56 kg by my 26th birthday which is in two years and be fit, healthy and happy. I have now until 2019 to change myself for the better. This is my long-term goals.

My goals for now is to quit the gym (just, listen to why), because if I stay there, I will feel pressure which leads to me not going or becoming unmotivated to even work out. I instead want to start walking everywhere, everyday. Instead of driving, I will walk to my appointments or grocery store. I will walk to the shopping center if I want makeup. I will just basically walk every single day. I will track my walks so I can keep track of the calories I burn and the distance I walked. I will also be writing in a food diary everyday so I can track what I eat throughout the day.
I want to try to lose around 5 kg a week. Walking is the only exercise that doesn’t make my bones ache or leaves me bedridden in pain.

I think those are pretty realistic goals and I know that if I can keep myself in a routine and motivate myself everyday, I will eventually see results and slowly lose weight. Below I will provide a photo of my current weight. I will try to upload a photo of my progress at the end of every month, so you guys can also see my progress as well.

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So that is it for this post. I know it’s long and I do apologise, but I just wanted to share everything with you. As I said at the top of this post, I am quite scared of uploading this but I feel a little bit of the stress lifting from my shoulders just by sharing my story with you.

If you did like reading this, please give it a thumbs up! If you would like to keep updated with me, please subscribe to my blog – I post every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 6 am AEST. 🙂

Are you on a fitness journey? 

Until next time,

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87 thoughts on “Weight-Loss Journey | My Story

  1. Girl! I can so relate to you on this post! I’m not at my biggest but I am definitely not at my best. I refuse to go to the gym too because I think for me it is a waste of money for the lack of enthusiasm I have when I am there. The only thing I will say is have you thought about doing classes? They are the most motivating way to get your shit together and give it your all! But definitely keep up the walking, that’s why having my dogs is so good! I walk all the time! Are you going to be doing any particular diet or food plan? Keep up the good work! You will be so proud of yourself! X

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I have thought about it but my anxiety gets the best of me and I just can’t do it 😣 Plus some of the exercises they do I won’t be able to do due to my brittle bones so it’ll be a waste of time going 😪
      Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to comment!
      I won’t be starting off with a diet as I’ve tried to diet many many times and it always fails, so what I’m going to do and eat smaller portions, watch what I put on my plate and write down everything I eat so I can keep track and know what to change etc, if that makes any sense? xx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. This is an amazing post, thank you so much for sharing 🙂 I am also trying to lose weight at the moment as I’m at my biggest weight. I find going to the gym makes me so anxious as well because I feel like I stand out in front of all the really fit people. Having a plan is always the best place to start, best of luck to you on your journey x

    Liked by 2 people

  3. It’s very brave of you to share this with us and i really admire you for that!! Whether you believe or not, you are beautiful and if losing weight will make you happy than do it! Good luck on your journey, i hope you’ll be able to reach your goal and finally be happy! I just wanted to tell you that i am a skinny person because I have a fast metabolism, my whole life, people used to bully me because I an skinny, some people thought i was anorexic so i struggled a lot and i hated my body. I really wanted to gain weight. But I learned to embrace myself and my body. Till now people stay point it out in a negative way but I don’t care, i love my body and i am VERY healthy, i dont have any deficiency. I know, it may sound weird that I used to hate myself cause I am skinny because “being skinny” is supposedly the ideal body but it’s not, people will bully you no matter how you look and it’s sad!!!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m so sorry you got bullied for that! It’s such a sad world that we live. So many expectations are made of us and it’s sad. I’m so glad you’re happy with yourself and love yourself now, it’s a very important part of life! I hope I can one day love myself and not be so hard on myself!
      Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to tell me your story! 💛💛

      Liked by 1 person

  4. You dont have to apologise babe because I am sure your story and your determination will motivate and inspire others just like it inspired me.
    The bone problem that you have, its unfortunate and I do hope that if there is a cure anywhere in the world, you find it soon.
    And even after going through all that, you are willing to take a step for good. You are willing to make a change. That counts a lot more than we give ourselves credit for.
    I am not overweight but I am not happy in my body right now, and I am trying to change my lifestyle. But being a lazy ass person I am, I quit very easily.
    You probably know this but I ll say it any way, drink as much as water possible. Diets are hard and restricting calories is also very hard when you are just starting to bring a change so start with water.
    I am trying to increase my water intake. I started today and I had around 3000 ml of water today and honestly I feel awesome. Except the part where I have to go to the toilet every hour 😂😂
    I am trying to lose weight too and I know how easily I fall back into old habits.
    It was very brave of you to share your story and I wish you all the freaking best and I maybe alot younger than you but if you wanna talk about calories or diets or exercise or if you just wanna rant about how annoying losing weight can be sometimes, you can always count on me for that.
    We all are here to cheer for you. You got this love 💕

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much for this kind comment! Unfortunately there is no cure for osteoporosis imperfecta, it’s more common in elderly people but I unfortunately got it when I was born. It’s only going to get worse when I get older as your bones don’t tend to get stronger as you get older aha
      I fine with it tho, I’ve had it since I was born (born with two broken legs!) and have gotten use to it over the years.
      I’m trying to drink more water as well, I do really good one day then the next I suck aha I’m also trying to stick to herbal teas instead of coffee (need one in the mornings though) and regular tea.
      It’s so hard because I grew up with a lot of sugar and carbs so trying to cut down on that is a nightmare 😩
      Thank you again for the kind comment, it really made me happy! 💛

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You are very strong and honestly after reading your story, I questioned myself that what excuse do I have ? So yeah you my friend are inspiring people and also making them a little guilty about being lazy 🙊 but its good, I needed that push.
        I try to drink green tea but boi that ish is just not for me 😂😂
        I understand that because my lunch box was always filled with noodles and then in highschool I used to eat chips and chocolate in school. Plus I was a foodie growing up, had a record of eating 13/14 pizzas at a time 🙊 I used to have 8 to 10 slices of toasted bread every morning. And that shit just kept on making me fat.
        Hoping to lose all that my eating healthy and drinking tons of water.
        You are most welcome 💕💕.

        Liked by 2 people

      2. I personally love green tea! Have you tried peppermint tea? That stuff is good! It also keeps your hunger under control, like if you think you’re hungry, have water, if you’re still hungry, have some peppermint tea, if you’re not hungry after that, then you weren’t really hungry, right? If you are, then get yourself some food. That’s how I do it! I always drink water first though! 💛

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Never tried it but a friend of me suggested it too, I am just waiting to finish this box of plain green tea and then I am definetly gonna get peppermint tea.
    Yup I do the same, whenever I feel like I might go to the kitchen and eat something I shouldnt be eating at this tiime, I drink water real quick and most of the times it makes the hunger go away which clearly means I wasnt hungry, i was just bored 😂😂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. It’s the worst when you think you’re hungry, so you eat and then realise you weren’t actually hungry at all and feel so shit after 🙄 this is my problem daily haha
      I’m doing good today so far for my first official ‘healthy eating/weight loss journey’ day though! 💛

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Good luck on your journey!
    If going to the gym stresses you out, by all means, find other ways to get your excercise in 🙂 I’m also a walker, always got my pedometer running and got it linked to my calory counting app.
    One thing I reacted to, do you really think 5kg per week is realistic and sustainable? That’s like… 35 000kcal deficit in a week.5000 kcal a day. What is that, 10 hours on a treadmill?
    Perhaps you should lower that goal or you might risk setting yourself up for failure 😦

    Liked by 2 people

    1. The 5 kg is what I’m aiming for. I’m planning on walking everywhere, to my appointments, to do my errands etc and not drive. Which means I’ll be walking a few hours a day, which I’m okay with.
      Thank you for taking the time to comment ☺️

      Like

  7. I am so proud of you for opening up and sharing your story despite the anxiety that I’m sure came along with it! You are so beautiful and I know that you will kick butt during your journey! And always remember; slow progress is better than no progress. I have to remind myself of this small fact everyday! I am always looking to see results immediately and obviously that is not how it works. But we can do this, we are strong, brave women and can do anything we set our minds to!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m the same! I’m always looking for results immediately and when I don’t see them I get so upset aha
      We can! I’m hoping I can do this!
      Thank you for the really kind comment, it means a lot to me! 💛💛

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Gyms make me so self conscious! I’ve been working out at home for years and love it. Personally, I love the workouts I’ve discovered on YouTube more than anything else.
    Do you girl! Good luck on your journey 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  9. You can do it! I lost weight just through walking. I’ve never stepped foot in a gym, and I’ve lost over five stone. Good luck on your journey, I can’t wait to see the end results 💞
    Panda xo | thealienb4by.wordpress.com

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Hey! It’s so brave of you to share your story and you should be very proud of yourself! I know first hand how difficult it is when you are unhappy with your weight. I now work with many clients that are struggling with the same thing, so just know that you are not alone. Best of luck with your weight loss journey and I look forward to reading about it!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. You are so strong for sharing this Emily! It is comforting to know that we are all fighting our own battles. I love finding workout videos on YouTube (also love the BBG workouts by Kayla Itsines) and doing them from home. Best of luck on this journey girl! I know you will accomplish all of your goals ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I think it is so brave of you to share your insecurities with every one! You’re so inspiring, every one has insecurities but not every one has it in them to face them head on so you should be so proud of yourself! I hope you get to a place where you are comfortable in your own skin, I am sure with a little determination you will be great!!
    Have you thought about making a rule that after a certain time in the evening you don’t have anything else to eat? Say 5pm? That way you wont be able to add calories that wont be burned off! Its not for everyone but its a little tip I have so thought I would share it with you 🙂

    I wish you the best of luck on your journey, I have so much faith in you! I look forward to your updates x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for this lovely comment!
      I actually do that rule, I don’t eat anything after 7pm because I have dinner quite late (6pm) and it seems to be working! It was so hard the first 3 nights but I’ve got myself into the habit and now I don’t get hungry before bed ☺️ x

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Sending you tons of support! I too have struggled with my body over the years. It’s so frustrating to be at war with your body. Like you I am taking the necessary changes to become healthy and happy, its going to be a wild ride, but i know it will be worth it! Hang in there! We re all in this together!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Yes yes YES I can totally relate. I had “gymntimidation” so bad and just had to find out what worked for me in terms of exercise. We recently adopted a dog, and I am walking now more than ever, and the weight is finally coming off! Kudos to you for setting a goal that is achievable.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much!! And that’s so amazing! I have had a really bad few days with over eating but I’m keen to get back into routine and a good mindset to keep going! I’m not going to punish myself by it though, I need to learn from it ☺️ Good luck on your little journey gorgeous! xx

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Hi emilyzonline,
    Salute to you to post and sharing your story.One must be so honest to share such a story.I think the biggest thing is happiness ..be happy and let others also be happy must be the mantra for every success.
    Always be happy and try authentic and proven methods to get you in shape.
    ashok ..www.godownweight.com (a weightloss blog site)

    Liked by 1 person

  16. You can do it!

    The most important thing to know is that you need to be in a calorie deficit to lose weight.

    I look forward to seeing what the future has in store for you!

    Liked by 1 person

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